at the edge of sleep
if i dare to let myself fall
dreams are found
in the compost
of my memory mind
so to dare to sleep is to
dare to dream into the soil
of my brain where the memories
of a life that i’m not sure ever happened
live
futile to fight night
it will always come
& to prepare for bed
is to prepare to let my mind happen
so before i let myself fall
every night i wait for 10 minutes
sometimes an hour
sometimes the whole night
checking, checking to see if i feel brave enough to let myself fall behind shut eyes