They were having a late afternoon walk by the river, as they often did when the weather was good. It was their favourite place, one of gentle quiet and privacy that was otherwise difficult to find in the compact suburb where they lived. There was birdsong in the air and dappled sunlight skipped beneath the trees. Here, the lush green vegetation always lent an air of enchantment to their many shared confidences. And now, over the well-worn path of a deep and loyal friendship, they spoke about the big news.
Her emigration, to America.
Like so many Scots after Culloden, their history teacher had said.
'Life will be different according to Dad, so I need to prepare for that. He says America is like another world – bigger and better and full of opportunity. But, I’m not so sure. And I like this world just fine.'
'I can’t imagine my future without you,' said the girl who was staying.
There was a forced lightness in her friend’s reply. 'You don’t have to...it’ll be here soon enough. The future’s like that, it just keeps coming.'
But the girl who was staying felt, painfully, that the future was robbing her of her present, the here and now bound as it always had been by the two of them together – making plans, imagining possibilities, sharing their excitement and nervousness and all manner of other emotions which their teenage brains were slowly coming to recognise.
They lived across the street from each other and had been as close as sisters ever since their mothers latched on to each other for playdate coffees while the rest of the world went off to work. Together as toddlers with unruly hair, the two girls had bunny-hopped their way through ballet lessons. At school they had been fortunate to be in the same class. Out of school they had moved freely between their neighbouring houses, spending long hot summers in each other’s gardens and later swapping opinions as well as clothes. They had remained best friends despite hurt feelings, uncomfortable misunderstandings and all the other invisible growing pains caused by the gradual influx of more and more people into their expanding lives.
The girl who was leaving put an affectionate arm around the girl who was staying. She felt the guilt of abandonment despite the fact she was not the one to inflict this fracture. Her parents had broken their news to her emphatically with carefully rehearsed enthusiasm and afterwards she’d taken some time to set things straight in her own mind. Though she was anxious and unsure what world awaited her, she had been well trained in the art of counting her blessings and she acknowledged she had a lot to look forward to.
'Will you be gone before Halloween? Remember, our costume this year was going to be two peas in a pod.'
'Gutted about that, but yes, I’m afraid so.' She kicked the ground carelessly, sending twigs and stones into the air. So much of their joy was wrapped up in their joint anticipation of future Acts, whether their narrative later turned out to be comic, tragic, even absurd. Now they were to be untethered, their performances separated.
The loss would be bitter for them both. As they walked, they talked and played around with the question of who was in for the harder time. Breaking away from all that was familiar was undeniably daunting and scary but the girl who was staying knew her friend had the inventiveness and resilience to recast herself anew. She told her so. Yet, in herself, she was not so confident. Without the lustre of their unique friendship, she envisaged her life losing colour, its pigment leaking away through a person-sized hole.
Then, beyond a gap between the trees, he cycled into view – the boy from the year above. With youthful, inexperienced eyes both girls beheld heart-stopping male perfection. Their conversation fell silent as they watched his athletic figure pedal down the path. The girl who was leaving was smitten with him. Many times, to her friend, she’d feverishly confided as much and in so doing had claimed him as hers. As things stood however, he belonged to no one. The girl who was staying was equally infatuated but was unable to reveal her feelings due to the strength of her friend’s own declaration. No matter she thought, he didn’t even know they existed. It was all theoretical.
Or was it? To both their surprise, he smiled and gave a casual wave as he passed by. And, as she smiled and waved back in reply, the girl who was staying felt something change within her. She would miss her friend so badly, but she knew that, somehow, she would find the strength to write her own story.