Please note: this piece contains descriptions some readers may find upsetting.
Christmas 2022, my family visited my Mom in Florida, like always. We live in Scotland.
'I’ve had a scan, and they think it’s most likely cancerous' she told us when we arrived. I had hope that it wasn’t cancer and we all continued to have a lovely family holiday, with my strong, beautiful Mom.
I called her most days, like usual, when we returned. She had been married to a builder for almost 30 years, but they were always speaking of divorce for the past 10 years or so. They built up the business together, both working hard every day, and making it a huge success, but he controlled everything. Although they still worked together, and she would make his meals, do his laundry, care for him when he was ill, they lived apart. My Mom wanted what was hers, so she could live her own life without this control over her money. She wanted to leave an inheritance to me and my sister. One day I called her, and she was delighted with hope.
'He is finally going to sign an agreement; he’s bringing the papers over now.' She said.
Her voice tailed off as though someone just arrived, so I asked, 'Is that him there now?'
She sounded distracted, weird, and just said 'I have to go'.
Every single day since then, I wished I hadn’t hung up. Was there a clue? Something that might have let me know what happened next?
This was the last time I heard my Mom as her true self. I couldn’t get a hold of her for days after that call. I spent days desperately, calling, emailing, with no answer. 'When do we start to panic?' I asked my sister who also lived in Scotland and couldn’t reach her.
'Maybe tomorrow' she said. I hoped and prayed she was okay. Tomorrow came, but she didn’t answer. Her friend Diane answered.
'Your Mom was found semi conscious and naked with bruises all over her body and a large glass bowl smashed, with cushions flung to the other side of the room.' Diane cried.
There was a police report filed by my cousin but thereafter things moved so fast. She went into ICU, both kidneys had failed. She needed double nephrostomy tubes, and thereafter received a diagnosis of stage 4 ovarian cancer. The police report was dropped because they couldn’t interview her.
In ICU her husband got her to sign a marital agreement and filed for divorce with the court, without attaching the agreement. He was a multi-millionaire. He agreed to give my Mom $5 million plus two properties. It sounds like so much, but this deal was very much in his favour. My Mom was so happy she would finally have access to money she worked for. Luckily Diane took screenshots of the document she signed as evidence as he would not give my Mom her own copy. This agreement was never shown by him again, even when asked for by lawyers.
The next few months from February until September, she stayed in Fort Lauderdale where she could be near Diane. Diane was all me and my sister had. My Mom now needed so much care. Diane did everything she could from changing diapers, nephrostomy bags, wound care, collecting food and cooking. My family travelled over as much as we could to get her through chemotherapy, but we had kids at school, and I needed to keep my job. I took unpaid leave where I could. My Mom changed from the most energetic, beautiful woman, to a frail, anorexic woman who could barely stand.
But we all had hope.
She finished her round of chemotherapy, despite how weak she was. She started physiotherapy and could do steps with a walker.
We all had hope.
My family spent the entire summer with her to get her through rounds of chemo. We left in August. September, she completed chemo, and the plan was to get her onto maintenance therapy. She went into hospital with a urine infection and covid.
Her husband took her back to Palm Beach. He did everything to speed up her death. My Mom asked a nurse to call the police as he was starving her. The police believed him, saying she was confused. He cut her off from access to money. There was an occasion I called her, and she didn’t hang the phone up properly. I heard her ask him for orange juice. He laughed at her and said he had no time. We travelled back over as soon as we could. The next time we saw her once again, she was almost dead. He refused care for her while we were there. I stayed up round the clock, feeding her, changing her, nursing her back until she gained some strength. She was starving.
It gave me hope as I watched her health return.
We got her lawyers to help fight her divorce case. “Waiting her out” was a term used. He avoided every court date, knowing if she passed, he would not ever have to give her a penny. She had to sell everything in her name to pay for 24-hour care eventually. He cut her off from all finances.
My Mom passed away in April. I held her hand. Nothing prepares you for that, but as I watched her take her last breath, I had hope she was moving on to a better place. She was out of pain. Maybe she could see her Mom and Dad again. I don’t have a particular belief, just hope.
24 hours later he changed the locks to her property and put an eviction notice on Diane’s door. We may never get access to the things she saved for us, and we will never get the inheritance money she worked so hard for.
I just hope one day justice will prevail. Hope is what kept me going, what keeps me going.
Even when everything looks hopeless, I have hope.